Sarah's Library

15/10 - I started reading this (and by 'started' I mean I read about 15 pages) back on the 3/9, but due to more pressing library due dates and visiting family members it (and the rest of the series) has been put on the back burner, but with only five days left the Barefoot Bay series has now become the most pressing library due date. I have five days to read seven books all of which have already been renewed twice, and so therefore can not be renewed again without the librarian's permission, and considering there are seven of them I don't think that's likely. The one good thing in the situation is that I have signed up to participate in Dewey's 24 hour reading marathon, so at least I have plenty of reading material and good motivation to make an effort to truly read for as many of those 24 hours as possible. To be continued...

17/10 - I understand Will's attitude towards putting Guy in a care home, but he has to realise that there comes a time when in home care is no longer an option. Often when a person's memory gets as bad as Guy's is they tend to forget more than just the past, they forget to take care of themselves - bathing, eating, and toileting. When that happens it can become very difficult for family members to continue to care for their relative themselves as there are often times when the person doesn't make it to the toilet in time and this can be quite distressing for all involved.

*By the way, I'm not feeling beaten by the themes of abuse in this book, I'm feeling beaten by my library due dates and the number of books that have to go back tomorrow.*

My grandad has a type of dementia called Dementia with Lewy Bodies, which causes severe and constant auditory and visual hallucinations. We are currently managing his care through having him live in a granny flat within steps of our home. He is capable of making himself toast and mashed egg or microwaving some soup but we no longer trust him to use his stove or oven without hurting himself - pots of hot water tip in his hands, he neglects to properly protect his hands from the inside of a hot oven, he forgets to turn off gas elements after he finishes cooking, he burns food nearly to the point of fire in the oven - so we cook all his main meals for him. He is no longer physically capable of managing any housework more strenuous than sweeping his kitchen floor (which is the size of a medium floor rug) or wiping the bench, so we have cleaners come in to take care of everything else once a fortnight. Grandad sees people in the yard who aren't there, hears what he believes are builders working during all hours of the night, tells stories of his past that didn't happen (corroborated by his daughter, my mum, who was there and can say for certain what did and didn't happen), and has become quite paranoid about what the neighbours are doing (even though they aren't actually doing anything). There will come a day, probably within the next 12 months or so, when Grandad needs 24 hour supervision and care whilst toileting, which we can't provide. We are just fortunate that he remembers all of his family member's names and faces. If/when he starts to forget us it will definitely be time to consider more professional care.

I also question Will's determination to get Jocelyn to forgive her father for his behaviour while she was growing up. Just because he no longer remembers doesn't mean she can forgive and forget. The abuse he heaped on her (and her mother) growing up permanently changed her life. And because he doesn't remember what he did he can't even ask for her forgiveness or make amends. He just acts like it never happened, because for him it didn't. Asking Jocelyn to forgive her father when her father's behaviour has only changed because his brain is degenerating, rather than because the person she knew as a teenager is actually remorseful, is not fair. It's like not jailing a murder because they got hit on the head and no longer remember their crimes. Just because they don't remember doesn't mean they're not guilty.

I have noticed a couple of awkwardnesses with St. Claire's writing. On page 173 there is this unfortunate sentence

'He rocked his erection into hers.'

In case no one caught it, 'her' is a woman and she doesn't have an erection. Maybe St. Claire meant pelvis?

Then on page 189

'Still lost in pools of brown eyes...'

Is it just me or is everyone else imagining a swimming pool full of brown eyeballs and a guy swimming around trying, but failing, to get out? Not my idea of the right image for a romance... but I'm not the author. To be continued...

A few hours later - Okay, now I understand that Will didn't realise the extent of the abuse Jocelyn and her mother were suffering at the hands of Guy and that's why he was so blasé about the whole 'forgive and forget' idea. What I don't understand is why he didn't realise. I mean he lived next door and was BFFs with one of the occupants of the house, how did he not notice. My neighbours on one side are very loud arguers - with each other and with their teenage children - if you happen to be outside while they're arguing inside you can actually catch the gist of the argument (let alone if one of the arguers is outside). There is no way we could miss hearing domestic violence going on, and we're not exactly what you would call 'friendly' with these neighbours. Whenever the yelling reaches a certain level of loud that's scary to listen to, I always make a point of listening (instead of just accidentally hearing) to make sure yelling is all that's happening. There is no way we could miss hearing domestic violence going on, and we're not exactly what you would call 'friendly' with these neighbours. To be continued...

18/10 - 3.5 stars. I felt like the plot of this focussed more on Guy and his illness than it did on Jocelyn and Will's relationship. Everything circled back to him - Jocelyn's decision to leave and to not have sex, Will's original passivity regarding Jocelyn's departure and the lack of a call from his agent, then Jocelyn's decision to stay while Will left (or so she thought). Community awareness of Alzheimer's is very important but I felt like that theme took over the whole book, leaving little room for romance. The romance felt rushed, like they had to fit it in between crises with Guy, almost like they were still teenagers trying to avoid getting caught by their parents. Generally I liked Jocelyn and Will, but I didn't feel like I knew Will very well. I wanted more information about his baseball career, where his parents were and what his relationship with them was like. I felt like the characterisation of the main characters was a bit one-sided in Jocelyn's favour. Looking forward to getting started, and maybe finished for the Dewey 24 hour Readathon, on Zoe's story.